Untangling the Idea of Freedom
What does freedom really mean for us beyond flags and fireworks?
July brings the full heat of summer and, in America, the explosive celebration of Independence Day. Flags, fireworks, family, friends, and freedom—that's July 4th in a nutshell.
That last one, "freedom," is often discussed in terms of national pride. What it means to be a free country, and what it means to be free as individuals.
Freedom Isn't What You Think
Individual freedom can be deeply misunderstood. When you're young, you think of freedom as "I can finally do what I want to do." As you grow older—starting your career, building relationships, maybe raising children—you understand that freedom comes with responsibilities.
Move further into adulthood, and some responsibilities give way to more time again. But then you recognize that your freedom will become constrained by Father Time. You may have the time and desire to live free in your golden years, but will you be able to afford it financially and physically?
We learn that freedom comes with a cost—both as a country and as individuals. We can't always do what we want (that's impulsivity), and sometimes we can and should do what we don't want (that's discipline). These are different sides of the same coin.
The Paradox of True Freedom
For me, true freedom comes more in discipline than in following my impulses. The fact that I'm choosing not to do certain things takes as much courage and strength as doing those things.
Holding back is harder than holding on or pushing forward. Loosening my grip takes strength. It's counterintuitive.
When Freedom Changed for Me
Last year, when I walked away from my job, I literally had a "zero email inbox" the next day—a dream fantasy, right? But it was a day of uncertainty even though I was completely free of corporate conditions. It was like I died to that world.
Knowing that I wasn't going back (not retiring yet, but not wanting to work full-time) was a great sense of relief. I was free to do anything. Crazy concept, and it dropped in my lap at the ripe young age of 61.
So now what?
I had freedom from corporate pressure, noise, expectations, opinions, judgments, criticism, complaints, requests, projects, timelines, PowerPoints (YAY!), and budgets (right on!!).
Now I had time to rest, choose my path, change my mind, to be myself... but was I free? In some ways yes, in other ways no.
The Real Question
There are decision points we all face. Which way will we go? What will we do? But in that moment, I was reminded that this phase of my life was more about who I would become.
Not what would I do differently, but who will I be differently.
There's a saying: "No matter where you go, there you are." You can't free yourself from yourself. Your Self is always with you.
And who that Self becomes is actually a real and true opportunity for freedom.
The Greatest Gift
What leaving my job gave me—the greatest gift—was the time to learn and discover my Self. Maybe this sounds hokey, and it did to me too... but it's not. You know it's true if you take time to really think about it.
Who are you outside of your job?
Who are you outside of your marriage?
Who are you outside of your kids?
Who are you outside of your activities?
Who are you outside of your beliefs?
Strip it all away. Who are you, and who do you want to be differently?
Your Freedom Assignment
This week, enjoy the fireworks and the food and your family—but make space for yourself to consider what freedom means for you personally.
Are you really free? Or are you only defined by other people, places, or things? What is your identity and self tied to? If it's anything other than who you are becoming, then maybe you need to search for where real freedom resides.
Inside.
